We ended the 2014 Perspectives Rap Session on a high note. There were a number of returns, missed faces, and new people who attended. I was absolutely thrilled to see them all. Imatellmuva blessed the event with some awesome food and we were nourished and sustained.
The conversation topic of the evening was domestic violence (also known as intimate partner violence). I shared my experiences being both the "victim" and perpetrator. We shared perspectives about violence in relationships and in society in general. We gave our perspectives on public instances of domestic violence and discussed violence (both emotional and physical) triggers.
David and Rashad are missing from the group photograph below.
This particular rap session probably ended up being one of my more favorite sessions this year. The energy in the room was everything it needed to be.
Instead of coming with an agenda, I decided (since it was the last one of the year) to have an open discussion. The conversation turned to men, shutting down, and ending relationships...that was the general theme. The questions were posed about what shutting down looks like and what men ending relationships looks like.
We talked about what shutting down means and how it affects the person on the receiving end of the "shut". We learned that shutting down can be a coping mechanism to help to preserve the peace in the relationship and to avoid verbal or emotional strife or abuse. We also learned that it's important to give a timeline when communication would be resumed in order to be fair to the person who desires to communicate in the "now".
There were plenty of gems dropped. The floor was glittery honey!!!
The conversation shifted to what ending relationships is like for men. We talked about the fear, the emotion, and the process from a male perspective.
Overall, the event was a success (as usual) and we even got a mini concert from one of the attendees. We shared event, business, and professional information and made a lot of networking connections.
Thank you to Tula, Lakia, Aneesah Morine, Ann Marie, Oshun, Dawn, Lee, Greta, Sean, Angela, Angie Byrd, Kafi, Pinpoint, Chris, Brian, Jon, Shereese, Joy, Dyon, Hope, Jonathan, and Terrence of Nzuri Salon & Spa for an awesome evening.
The ladies and I spent time discussing what "sexy" looked like at 20 and what it means to us now that we are older. A lot of women believed that sexy was external, but grew to understand sexiness as more of a state of mind. I believe this is a common experience for many women in their evolution.
We talked about connection and family and how we get caught up in what family is supposed to look and act like, and how that impacts our relationship with self and others.
We reflected on what we love about being a woman. We shared wine and laughter and bonded in a way that many women crave. Once again, it was a positive experience. We had women from a variety of backgrounds attend that evening. A lawyer, an aspiring pediatrician, a budding actress, a real estate consultant, an inspirational speaker, a teacher, a radio show host, a wellness coach, a caregiver, and a couple of newcomers blessed the space with their presence. I left the space feeling both whole and grateful.